The Fertility Journey: We need a navigator
Fertility treatment is a journey: You are in it for the long haul. The goal is a baby in your arms, but right now you can’t see the forest for the trees. There are many things that need to happen before that precious moment.
Most people do not know how the human reproductive system works. It is in fact very complicated. When I started working in this field as a Fertility Nurse, I was stunned to find out all the factors that have to line up correctly for a pregnancy to happen. These were not things that I learned in nursing school.
It makes you wonder how humans populated this world in the first place. It’s not as simple as sex = baby. Women have been taught since childhood told that any sexual encounter will end in pregnancy but are surprised to find out that when they are ready to become pregnant, that it’s not all fun. It’s actually work.
Timing, hormones, uterine lining, age (unfortunately, it is something that will need to be addressed) and sperm production are some factors to consider. It doesn’t take much to bring the reproductive process to a halt. Now, there are women who do get pregnant right away; however, that is not the norm; most women do not and when there are any infertility issues, it just compounds the problem.
Believe it or not, often the huge missing piece is often that people do not in fact know how the reproductive system works. Many women go on birth control at a young age as they are not ready to become pregnant. Women know most of the options: birth control pills, injections, Intrauterine Device (IUDs). But do they know how they work in the body? Once people understand the basic process, they understand how getting assistance from their OBGYN or consulting with a Reproductive Endocrinologist and Infertility (REI) specialist can help to achieve the goal.
Many people do not want to be at an REI specialists office. For some, it is a sign of failure and weakness; it can feel isolating. The thing to know is there are so many people who need assistance that it’s difficult to even get an appointment. The latest statistic is one in six couples seek infertility treatment. Think about that: Within your own network of friends who have children, one in eight has sought treatment. Here’s the other thing: NOBODY talks about it. Again, people see it as some sort of failure on their part. It is important to know that you are not alone.
What I admire about some celebrities is that they are not afraid to talk about their infertility issues and admit to doing Intrauterine Insemination (IUI), In-Vitro Fertilization (IVF), donor egg or sperm and gestational carriers.
This is the start of the conversation. Every person has a story to tell and every person or couple desires to know and understand the process. Many will use the Google rabbit hole or social media to get information. Can you get legit information from these searches? Sure. But the best advice is from a knowledgeable source who understands not only the anatomy and physiology, but also the ins and outs of how a fertility clinic works. What to look for, how to interpret results and how to understand your personalized treatment, what do these medications do anyways? And most importantly, know that there are no silly or stupid questions. You don’t know what you don’t know. Have an ally in your corner and be your navigator.
Ann Marie Luft has been a Fertility Nurse for more than 10 years, with experience in every aspect of the field. Learn more about how she can help guide you through your reproductive journey.
